Archive for the ‘Computer Jokes’ Category
The Less You Know, The More You Make
04
May
“Salary Theorem” states that “Engineers and Scientists can never earn as much as Business Executives and Sales People.”
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematica......
Is Windows a Virus
04
May
No, Windows is not a virus. Here’s what viruses do:
1.They replicate quickly – okay, Windows does that.
2.Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do......
You’ve been programming too long when
04
May
When you are counting objects, you go “0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D…”.
When asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits.
When your wife says “If you don&......
America Offline
04
May
A long, long, time ago
I can still remember when I dialed up their help desk lines.
And I knew if I had the chance
They could make my modem dance
with chats and GIFs and silly pick-up lines.
But......
Ann Landers
04
May
Dear Ann Landers,
I am a sailor in the New Zealand Navy.
My parents live in the suburb of Seatoun and one of my sisters, who lives in Palmerston North, is married to an Australian.
My Father and......
Buy a Mac
04
May
I was just having a conversation with someone who is about to buy a Mac.
I was against it and an argument started.
I said there were too few people supporting the Mac.
He responded, “When ......
Complaint Letter
04
May
An allegedly real-life customer complaint letter sent to the NTL complaints dept..
Dear Cretins
I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable......
Computer Acronyms
04
May
PCMCIA
People Can’t Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
ISDN
It Still Does Nothing
APPLE
Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
SCSI
System Can’t See It
DOS
Defective Operating Syst......
Give a Man a Fish
04
May
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
Teach him to use the Internet, and he won’tv bother you for weeks!
GM Like Computer Industry
04
May
At a recent COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated that:
“If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would......